It’s no secret that octopuses have a sense of humor. They’re constantly coming up with new jokes to make their friends laugh, and even enjoy a good practical joke themselves from time to time!
Ok, so maybe octopuses didn’t come up with these jokes. But still… The funniest octopus jokes are the ones that make you laugh so hard, your face hurts.
Octopuses have 8 arms (actually 6 legs and 2 arms, if we’re being technical) that can be used to do many things at once – from writing books to playing the drums (maybe… we might be stretching things here a bit).
They’re also very intelligent creatures with the ability to solve puzzles and open jars of peanut butter with their powerful tentacles.
But do they make good joke fodder?
Oh, you’re about to find out.
Octopus Puns. Don’t Get It All Twisted Up
- What do you call an octopus who’s really good at playing guitar? A rock-topus!
- What did the man say before deciding about whether or not he should adopt an octopus? I’m going to have to ink about it for a bit!
- Where do lady octopuses keep their money? In their octo-purses!
- What did the kind octopus tell his girlfriend? You octopi my heart!
- How do you know if an octopus is still alive? You check it’s octo-pulse!
- Why was the octopus such a good cook? Well, because he was actually a chef-alopod!
- How do fish get to school? That’s an easy one. They take the octo-bus!
- What do you call the space where an octopus happens to be sitting? Octo-pied!
- What do you call it when you cross a frog and an octopus? A croak-topus!
- Where did the sleepy octopus take a nap? On the seabed!
Octopus Jokes, So That You Can Walk Into The Comedy Room Well-Armed
- What is an octopus’s favorite shape? An octagon!
- What did the octopus say to his date? Hey, can I hold all 8 of your hands?
- How do you multiply numbers in octopus school? That’s easy… you octoply!
- Why did the octopus cross the road? He wanted to get to the other tide!
- What type of sea creature can add numbers together? An octo-plus!
- Why did the scared octopus cross the road in a hurry? To get away from the sushi restaurant!
- What would you call an octopus who can fly? An octo-copter!
- Where do talented octopus singers go to practice? The choral reef!
- Where do sick octopuses go when they need to get a medical operation? They go to the sturgeon!
- How was the octopus always on time? He always kept his eye on the clock-topus!
- The thing people don’t usually tell you about octopuses is how ink-redible they are!
Octopus Tentacle Jokes And Tentacle Puns, So You Can ‘Octopy’ The Funniest Spot In Your Friend Group
- How do you make an octopus laugh? You get it ten-tickles!
- What do you call two or more octopuses that look exactly alike? I-tenticle!
- How was the octopus able to beat the shark in an underwater fight? Because he came into the fight well-armed!
- What was the foodie octopus’s favorite food? Ten-tacos!
- How many appendages does an octopus have? Ten! Get it? Ten-tickles!
- What sea creatures greet each other sixteen times? Two octopuses shaking hands, of course!
- As the policeman octopus caught the bank-robbing cat red-handed, he pulled out a weapon with each tentacle. “Now I’ve got you,” the octopus said. But the cat just laughed. “I think you’re one arm short, pal!”
- One day, an octopus asked another octopus if he would help him grocery shop. But unfortunately, the other octopus was already cleaning, sweeping, cooking, doing homework, taking a bath, washing the windows, walking the dog, and feeding the cat. His reply was “hang on, I don’t have twelve hands!”
More Funny Octopus Jokes, So That You’ll Be Tenta-Cool
- What do you feed a hungry group of octopuses for dessert? Octopie!
- What do you call an octopus who’s wearing a hat? An octopus with a hat, of course!
- The other day, I had to take my pet octopus to the vet. Thankfully, the octopus is going to be ok. But the vet charged me six quid!
- Why’d the octopus blush? Because he accidentally saw the bottom of the ocean!
- Why couldn’t the octopus commit a crime? Because he didn’t have a bad bone in his body!
- A mad scientist created a creature with the head of a shark, the claws of a lobster, the body of a dolphin, and the tentacles of an octopus. I guess you could say that his creation was a crab-omination!
- Where do octopuses usually sleep when they camp? In tent-icles!
- What was the math-loving octopus’s favorite number? 3.14, otherwise known as octo-pi!
- Why was the octopus always able to stay in such a positive mood? Because he was always looking on the octo-plus side of situations!
- Why was the curious octopus always bored? Because he never seemed to find anything interest-ink to do!
- When are all octopuses born? In Octo-ber!
Squid Jokes That Are Truly Ink-Rredible!
- Did you hear about that guy who got the giant squid tattoo? I guess you could say he got really inked up!
- What’s the biggest danger posed to baby squid? Squid-nappers!
- What was the sporty octopus’s favorite game? Squidditch!
- How did the squid propose to his girlfriend? Hey, will you cala-marry me?
- What type of computer keyboard does a squid prefer to use? A SQWERTY keyboard!
- What was the squid’s favorite rock band? Ink Floyd!
- How can you find out if your squid has swallowed a clock? Because if you listen closely, you’ll hear it going tick tock-topus!
- What’s the name for a group of squid? A squad!
- What did the squid say after telling a joke? I was just squidding!
There you have it!
These octopus jokes and puns are sure to cause you to pull a mussel from laughing so hard, and are sure to help you have a whale of a good time!
Did we miss one? Leave a comment and share it.
Also, make sure to check out some of our other hilarious joke, pun, and one-liner articles.
See you next time!